Miscarriage- A shattering experience How to Handle?

Miscarriages are not uncommon given a lot of stress and medical complications women faces. When it happens with a woman, she is showered with a lot of sympathies and handling these sympathies become a challenge for her. No doubt, this is a very delicate stage in her life and she needs a lot of TLC or tender, love and care is required, offering sympathy more than necessary seems fake and forced upon. This is not what a woman looks for. Many women miscarries before 12 weeks of pregnancy which is quite common but women who undergoes this problem in later pregnancy finds it difficult to handle physiological as well as psychological impacts associated with this condition. It is quite a shattering experience for the couple. In late miscarriages, the depth of sorrow is too great making it unbearable at times.

Many times, woman who suffers from this tragedy feels that they will never be able to become normal as the sense of bereavement persists and at times harboured by women, not letting it go. Loss of pregnancy is devastating and it is very essential that the couple gets counselling after this loss. Losing unborn child has negative impact on the husband too hence both, husband and wife must go for the counselling sessions together. Counselling sessions help the couple to grieve for their loss in a natural manner. These sessions help them to release their bottled up feelings of anger, hopelessness and frustration. This process helps them in a variety of ways. As body of the woman starts healing, her mind also starts accepting the fact and slowly and gradually she comes around to accept this loss and move on.

At this time, many women harbour a feeling of guilt. They believe that this tragedy occurred because of something they did or didn’t do correctly. Counsellors work upon this feeling and make them realise the futility of thinking in a negative manner. Anger is also one of the predominant feelings seen in women who have recently miscarried. They feel that God has been unkind to them and it should not have happened with them. Feeling of antagonism is also directed towards other women in the family who are pregnant or who have recently given birth to healthy babies. Overwhelming sorrow is also experienced by women as a lot of hope and dreams were woven around this baby that has been lost to them unexpectedly. They will need a lot of love and understanding at this time as their defences are too low and they need all support and love they can get from their near and dear ones.

Women who have miscarried recently need to involve themselves in day to day routine. Husbands also need to be very patient with their wives as at this time they may be feeling fatigue, shock, depression, grief and a sense of failure. Women do not need sympathy at this time as it becomes difficult to handle. Instead they can do with a lot of love and understanding.